My first attempt into starting "decensoring" stuff lately, also wanted to release a trap doujin before pride month ended I guess, narrowly did it (if we ignore me cutting some corners but fuck it)

if you want to keep up with me doing that and other works come visit me on my server
https://discord.gg/8g4WSBdHuG

If you want to support me, thank you I will greatly appreciate it
https://www.patreon.com/coomerman

Good decensoring, tho page 18 still has black bars.

Base +14

RAW
I don't know how many people were working on this project or how long you took on it, but I definitely noticed the "cutting some corners" part. This definitely needed a quality QC.

Here are some mistakes I noticed:
P.1: A comma is missing after "Congratulations", "Heh", and "Alright".
・The "i" in "It's" should be lowercase.
P.2: An "a" is missing after "Such".
P.3: "Is going" should be "It's". If the sentence is continuing from the previous page, then add a "that" after "Thing" on P.2 and keep the "Is going".
・"He gotta" should be at the very least "He's gotta" if not " He's got to".
・Capitalize "with" and "let" and uncapitalize "It".
・Another "a" is missing after "such", and "a can" should be "I can".
P.5: "You know already" should be "You already know", and remove the "of".
・There should be a "the" added after "But now is".
・Capitalize the word "truly" and "being".
・And another "a" is missing after "such".
P.6: Capitalize the word "what's".
・"They arrived to our homeland and crossed the border" should be "They've arrived and crossed our (homeland's/nation's) border".
P.7: "With what purpose you have come to our country!?" It should be "have you".
・The "the" in "the reason is that" should be capitalized and the "you" looks like it should also be capitalized.
P.8: You misspelled "beatiful" twice.
P.9: "Yamato" should be "Yamato's".
・The word "its" is missing an apostrophe and remove "out" from the sentence.
・You're missing an "I" before "saw", and you're missing a comma after "were".
・Capitalize "and" and "what", but uncapitalize "you".
・"I have decided already" should be "I have already decided".

And here are some nitpicks I have:
P.1: "Let's work together for our first time as a couple" doesn't sound quite right. "Let's work together as a couple for our first time" or "For our first time (as a couple), let's work together".
・An untranslated bubble on P.6 (何だ)

One major thing I noticed is at P.6: "At the main temple gates" is wrong just from the English alone. There was no prior mention of a temple, nor does it look like a temple; it's more of a fort or castle.
Even the raw text makes no mention of it: "大和の国正門". (It roughly translates to "Yamato's main gates".)
But if that is the case, then Yamato is the one being invaded, and it isn't the nation of "Youkai". That means the whole preface of the story in P.5 is contradictory and translated wrong.
In fact the sentence from P.5 states the neighboring nation is not of "Youkai", nor is [not] called the nation "Youkai", but instead it's clearly stated in furigana as the nation called "あやかし" (Ayakashi).
What a rabbit hole this was!

It's clear that those who worked on this aren't proficient in English, but what I didn't foresee was the same lack of proficiency to be extended to Japanese.
What happened behind closed doors on this project is something to ponder. But all is apparent regarding the care that was given to this "translation".

Edit: You fixed it up with some of the mistakes pointed out which is all fine and dandy, but you still failed to apply what I pointed out.
The premise on P.5 is still wrong because it still remains unchanged except for the first panel.
We already established "Yamato" is the human nation, so why is it that they are planning to invade themselves?
We already established "Youkai" is read as "Ayakashi", so why is the text still unchanged?
The same questions could be applied to P.7 & 9.
Whatever the answers are, it doesn't look good at all. I will reiterate the same sentiment I made before: please, put more care and consideration into your translations.
Your group has been pumping out releases, but it's time to pump your brakes and reel it in; start focusing quality over quantity.

P.S. Apparently Ayakashi = Yokai, so some contention could be made whether or not the nation could be referred to as "Yokai", but for consistency's sake and as it was laid out by the author:
I'd prefer it to stay as Ayakashi.
You still didn't apply the fixes I pointed out for P.9, so I guess it really does show.

Last edited on 21 July 2022, 07:48.

Base +7, asriel02 +8, Mistermd -6, Braltewrakcus +10, fatman18 +6, ziggyb +7, Evyy +17, Spunty +6, Th3 Sl0th +6, cynamonbunz +38, kentrell leonard69 +6, Nothingss +5, LeisureLarry +8, and 4 more...

I wanted this done before the end of June so I delegated this project to someone else I know while I finishing up something I am about to release too.... I will deal with this later after I upload the next release...
anyone one lese that reads this, if you are willing to be a proofreader/QC who gets thanks as a rewards mostly (since I sure dont have the budget to paid work right now) join the server because I sure as fuck need those too while I am it, cleaners too

Last edited on 21 July 2022, 08:00.

Base +7, Mistermd +6, SayaAmy +6, TheRealSlimShady420 +6

thanks to @Vanilla Cream. Just copy-pasting to tag.

P.1: A comma is missing after "Congratulations", "Heh", and "Alright".
・The "i" in "It's" should be lowercase.
P.2: An "a" is missing after "Such".
P.3: "Is going" should be "It's". If the sentence is continuing from the previous page, then add a "that" after "Thing" on P.2 and keep the "Is going".
・"He gotta" should be at the very least "He's gotta" if not " He's got to".
・Capitalize "with" and "let" and uncapitalize "It".
・Another "a" is missing after "such", and "a can" should be "I can".
P.5: "You know already" should be "You already know", and remove the "of".
・There should be a "the" added after "But now is".
・Capitalize the word "truly" and "being".
・And another "a" is missing after "such".
P.6: Capitalize the word "what's".
・"They arrived to our homeland and crossed the border" should be "They've arrived and crossed our (homeland's/nation's) border".
P.7: "With what purpose you have come to our country!?" It should be "have you".
・The "the" in "the reason is that" should be capitalized and the "you" looks like it should also be capitalized.
P.8: You misspelled "beatiful" twice.
P.9: "Yamato" should be "Yamato's".
・The word "its" is missing an apostrophe and remove "out" from the sentence.
・You're missing an "I" before "saw", and you're missing a comma after "were".
・Capitalize "and" and "what", but uncapitalize "you".
・"I have decided already" should be "I have already decided".

Base +16, Th3 Sl0th +6

I wish there was more time of him as the wife

Base +7, PregnantWhoreFucker +6, Spunty +6, Syerathe +13, Ahryman +6, Tiger_Claw +6

P.17 "exceptions" should clearly be "expectations" based on the rest of the sentence.

Base +7

为啥有个安倍晋三在结尾？(ﾟДﾟ)ﾉ

Base +5, Sox_toy +6, croco1023 +4, fhnehdfnt +3, ckcn +5

lol I didn't expect this story to have some kind of… vanilla ending?
also hope there will be a after- wedding-married-life-extra

Base +6, Tiger_Claw +6, Darknessend +6