Well, here it is, the public story of the month, sorry for keeping you waiting, but now you can enjoy this story, the premise is simple, an agent infiltrates an enemy base without knowing the fate that awaits her... I hope like it!
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In page 57 she says that "Something entered my pussy and my vagina...!" I assume one of them should be ass/butt, ass/butthole, or anus. Also using "my" the second time is redundant and could be removed to flow better. The next line says "It's huge!". While it's not wrong, in the previous line she was talking about 2 things (I assumed previously.) now is referring to one. Which one? This is a slight inconsistency I only pointed out since it was on the page with the others. Page 61 What are her "two needles"? Page 63 "Don't let the pleasure win you!" You can drop "you" to sound better. Page 67 and 68 seem to be in reverse order. Page 111 "I will gladly be a loyal and total Cherry sister." I'm not sure what total is for. Is there a not total Cherry sister? It sounds like it is mixing what they be (loyal) with them saying they will submit to complete the process. Taking out the "and total" and maybe adding it as a separate sentence would sound smoother. Page 121 Second "sister" should be plural. Might also put "the" before "Cherry".
I really didn't start checking things until the error in page 57 so their might be things before then. I like the contribution but you might want to get a English speaking editor or pay closer attention to captions. I'm assuming the author isn't a native English speaker.
Oh my god, I didn't think there are so many errors, thanks for the feedback, no, I'm not a native English speaker so sometimes it's hard for me, I'll try to be more attentive in the future