Cancerous font, untranslated bubbles (like on 9th and 23rd page), lack of any typesetting... I can't comment on translation, but if the editing is anything to judge by, it's Laruffi's level.

Base +8, kirisutegomen69 +6, narc123 +6, unoshot +7, BotByte +6, wavedash +17, mugiwara84 +6, crazymagic +11, Dynellen +26, Crummydoll +7, NekoHime27 +12, kobatochandaisuki +6, gamergay +6, and 3 more...

This "translation" is a joke.

Base +13, THEbigOnEd +7, GuroLover12 +9, Crummydoll +7, gamergay +6, lfp6 +7, weltall1021 -8

Did you really have to shorten words? Also the font is odd.

Base +6

Laruffi actually does decent editing... Though translations are trash.
So.... Yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeah.

Base +10, Incense +6, ShiningBlade +6

It was better untranslated.

Base +7, Crummydoll +7

This is my first time to translate.

It is actually not good.

Sorry... ><

Base +7, Palaxius +33, phangtonk +6, NekoHime27 +12, flaminghippo -6, fappingking +6, Incense +6, Wilsoz +7, Hollow_Gaea +6

I lol'd on page 4: "Nooo :D"

Base +7, GuroLover12 -9, weltall1021 -8

More can be done, Yume123.

It's not "fuckface Laruffii" level, but more can be done. :)

Base +7, DJ_Puchuu +11

You need editor friend to have a decent shorten sentence hehehe you should not follow laruffi when it's still early for ya :D I like second part though.

Base +7

translations by [DUWANG]

Base +6, NekoHime27 +12, theculture -6, Vodkus God of Booze +5

For a first time translator, this isn't that bad. You need better editing, or an editor, but learning is never a bad thing and more translators is great.

Keep translating, and see if you can't scare up an editor. I apologize for those who aren't willing to cut someone learning the craft some slack.

Base +6

More translators is a good thing. Laruffii's problem is that he never learns, refuses to learn, and doesn't even admit he sucks. He just blames the "haters" and keeps crapping out non-translations. It's nice to see that yume123 isn't like that. Keep it up, and find someone to edit for you on the forums.

Base +8

I can't fap to this, the guy is not fat, old, and ugly enough.

Base +6, faggotop +6, Wilsoz +7

I see you tried to pass this off to Dynellen originally for his bounty...poor form sire.

Base +15